Probably not! From experience, I could not have balance and view pornography. Porn affected all areas of my life. Because I viewed porn, I continuously had to fight the dark side to keep my person in check.
More times than not, I failed those around me. I improperly interacted with my wife, my daughters, my grandchildren, and associates in business and social settings. I viewed them as sex objects.
Often, I would embarrass myself. When talking with a woman, my eyes automatically dropped to her bosom. When interacting with a man my eyes fell on his crotch. It seemed that I could not control my boundaries and respect other people’s privacy (space).
For me, masturbation and pornography go hand in hand. However, I eventually became aware that when I masturbated to a particular image (breast, legs, butts, crotches, gay and lesbian sex , eyes, or lingerie-clad women) my eyes automatically found those images in real-life settings. There were times that I felt that I am gay because I am attracted to men. I also connected with women of the lesbian orientation. When I masturbate to porn Web sites that feature other sexual orientations, I am drawn to the lifestyle.
Sharing all of this is rather difficult.
I am not sure of myself.
Can I be addicted to pornography and not have problems?
I doubt it!
Now, I go to SAA meetings to get group support for my addiction. I also see a therapist. I am in the process of finding a sponsor to call when I need help in the heat of the moment. Giving and receiving help is a spiritual act of kindness. Perhaps, if I help others at the meetings, I will receive the strength to overcome pornography.
Taking measures to change, I realize that I am not my problem. I just have to face the challenges of my addiction to overcome.
I am on the road to recovery.
I now have hope.