As you read each word in Chapter One of the book WINNING, you begin to feel your emotional ALERT systems.
You begin to understand how your body communicates with you on how to avoid porn.
Skim over every word in Chapter One and discover hope.
My True Story
What did I really want for my life? I didn’t even know?
“It was almost as if was a third-party, from the corner of the room, watching me at my PC, viewing pornography.”
The latest fetish was porn stars performing striptease acts. Reflexively, compellingly, I found myself surfing for better acts. I realized my body had a mind of its own. At the time, I thought of my porn self being controlled by my unconscious mind.
What was I doing? I found a site that I literally became enthused over that I purchased a membership using my bank card. What was I thinking?
The name on the sales transaction was not related to pornography. This was great. The porn site appeared legitimate (safe). However, that really did not matter. I had a problem. The numerous striptease and porn sites became boring. Masturbation took forever to complete.
I did some researched on how emotions controlled feelings and how they locked a person into an addiction.
Yes, I did want porn in my life or else I would have stopped.
The paradox: I hated pornography, but I loved it more.
My body uses sensations and feelings to communicate subconsciously
intent (medicate pain) as well as what I am focusing on at any given moment (beliefs).
Thoughts cause emotions, and emotions chemically activate feelings, and then feelings motivate actions, translating intent of one’s focus or intent.
What causes me to have stressful, fearful, uncomfortable, lonely, angry, hurtful, frustrated, disappointed, guilty, regretful, inadequate feelings?
My beliefs cause intense feelings to want more of porn. Actually, my beliefs triggered emotions that triggered my feelings that triggered an intensity of having to have the pornography that gave me the relief that I needed to rid myself of much pain.
In my research, I discovered that if I change the meaning of how think about a circumstance. My physical feelings changed.
Moreover, PHYSICAL SENSATIONS CHANGED.
I began to pay attention to my feelings.
If limiting feelings persisted (such as stress), my body automatically responded to emotional pain. If a short skirt passed by me, my head would turn. If a grocery clerk bent over, I either would automatically see her cleavage or bottom. I felt sensations pass through me. I felt better.
I began to understand that my mind and body were on autopilot.
Below, you will find life changing ideas.
The Pornography Industry programmed people to watch porn over and over again even when they do not want to do so.
Porn and masturbation make people feel good. However, it conditions the body (unconscious part of the brain) to use sexual feelings (pleasure) to medicate pain (painful emotions: angst, anxiety, stress, frustration, depression…).
Feelings of self-preservation at the cellular level of the body (and brain) were created to move an individual away from pain (things not good) and toward pleasure (that is good). Wholesome pleasure leaves lasting satisfaction.
The subconscious mind does not evaluate what it uses to alleviate the pain. It just medicates the pain with pleasure in turn begins the conditioning process.
If you used masturbation or pornography to relieve painful feelings (stress) in the past, then your body automatically resurfaces sexual feelings to alleviate similar painful feelings or stressors.
Important: immediately switch negative feelings with empowering thoughts. New feelings dissipate old sensations. Even if a person is viewing porn, at the time, the body will lose arousal sensations.
What empowering emotions can a person use to alleviate sensual feelings from emotion?
For example, Who are you grateful for right now.
Focus on caring, appreciation, gratitude, determination, curiosity, excitement, passion, flexibility, confidence, cheerfulness, and vitality.
Think on the list above and ponder on the one that stood out to you.
Center your entire thoughts … that feeling.
In the following Chapter, I go into greater detail of my battle with pornography and how I used my mind and body to overcome porn.
Go to Chapter 2.