Pornography: Blissful Striptease Sites Pulled Me in, every time; Losing the Meaning of Life, I considered….

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Serve People; Find Hope

When are the cravings for porn ever going to stop?

I felt a strong craving—an ache in the center of my lower abdomen—to view pornography.

I thought I had conquered it.

I’ll never forget the moment when I poured my soul out to God.

But now, why am I feeling this way? Why do I want to look at porn? All the pain that I suffered, why am I now even considering pornography.

A thought drifted into my mind: Out of sync.

What’s that suppose to mean?

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Sometimes, You Forget How Special You Are.

    I sat in front of my PC, pondering.  A porn site hit my mind; My favorite striptease site came to me.  My arm muscles tightened and my gut constricted.  I kept going until I clicked online.  Breathing became short and shallow.  My computer navigated to the site.  I became aroused.  I hit a high.

Out of sync … NO, I cannot do this. I stopped myself from masturbating.

I pushed away from the desk and left the room.

Reasoning: In-Sync, all cylinders firing … perfect timing.

Feeling the pull, the image of the porn site pushed back into my thoughts.

“God, what’s this about? How can I stop this?”  An answer drifted into my thoughts.

Not focusing on life’s purpose, any pleasure will do, especially, porn.

I went back to my room.  My eyes lighted on my book.  I turned to the divine purpose section. Reading what I had written about my life, I realized where my greatest joy came.  The options were either resist porn and not pursue my purpose; or resist and stay on the path of my life-purpose.

The feelings for porn diminished some.

I closed my eyes and relived special times in my life where I was helping a small group of people. The incredible response I received.  The joy I experienced.  How it changed my view of who I am.  A warm feeling started in the center of my chest, gratitude swept through me.  I rejoiced for the gift God gave me.

Then, I contrasted the emotion of gratitude with the emotions associated with pornography.  I  imagined porn back in my life. I experienced feelings of severe loss.

It felt like I was mourning the death of a love one.  I quickly shifted my thoughts back to gratitude.

The craving to view porn was gone.  I went back to my PC.  I clicked off of the internet.

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Follow Your Purpose!

…Then, inspiration stirred me: my greatest weapon against pornography was joy.  Making a difference in someone’s life made a contribution in my own life.

   Pornography Addiction Recovery Is

Purpose Centered Recovery;

Making a Difference Keeps It Alive!

To Your Peace,

Dale

Published by: curepornaddiction

In the year 1971 I became a store manager at age 19. I discovered I had a gift for mentoring. I gave one on one coaching, instruction and teaching with ease. And, I loved it. However, I had a problem that held me back from achieving my full potential. I was addicted to porn. When I was going through my puberty years in life, I found pornography (adult magazines) in my Dad's closet. I was hooked. I had my ups and downs throughout my life: Ups, when I was off of porn and using my gift: and, Downs, when I was using porn. Porn captured my attention, holding me back. I found the secrets to breaking free from porn. Like anyone else, I have to work at keeping my emotions positive, every day, to stay free. Limiting emotions--fear, doubt, hate, lust, sloth, pride, any emotion that kills joy. Joy is the ultimate weapon against porn. You have it; porn loses its hold on you. I dedicate this blog to those who are looking for ways to end pornography in their life. To Your Peace, Power and Plenty, Dale P.S. The picture above is not me. The photo represents all families free from pornography.

Categories Masturbation, Purpose-Centered Recovery, relapse, SuicideTags, , , , , , , , 6 Comments

6 thoughts on “Pornography: Blissful Striptease Sites Pulled Me in, every time; Losing the Meaning of Life, I considered….”

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