As you skim over every word of this article, you will see the struggle of an individual who wanted freedom from pornography.
For 50 years, I was addicted to porn. However, I discovered a Force that controls cravings, a hunger deep within the gut.
That Force was the “pain and pleasure” principle. When the pain became an emotional hell, I screamed, “I’ve had it.” I stopped.
When I forgot about the pain, porn slowly covered my mind and body with sensual pleasure hooking me, once more.
Why did I stop in the first place?
I wanted to rid myself of the emotional pain; guilt, anxiety, and depression.
When I stopped, it felt good. For awhile, I focused on those pleasurable feelings of stopping.
I noticed I had no interest in any sexual stimulation.
Then, I had an “Ah Ha” experience. I realized that I could control what was going on in my body.
“God created within mankind two sovereign powers, pain and pleasure; these powers rule us in all we think, say or do: Ignoring their influence harms us; harnessing their power controls our destiny.”–Anthony Robbins
Not until I realized the power of the pain and pleasure principle did I find a way to use the sexual urges and cravings as Warning Signals to alert me to possible relapses.
Sexual feelings in themselves are not wrong. Actually, they are good meant to be enjoyed.
Your significant other desires your love, physical and emotional.
When you give that love, your body sexually anchors those intimate feelings to you and your significant other’s entire being.
Now, when I have sexual feelings, I don’t resist. I allow those feeling to pass.
If they are not for my spouse, I put my mind on other things.
However, when those feelings come. I simply say, “These feelings are reserved for my soul mate.”
Also, any sexual thoughts, I also reserve for my soul mate.
I push out of my mind people, places and things that would pull me away from being true.
I have to work at it every day, just like you. And, just like you, I have slipped, even after I started writing this blog.
Like you, I learn from my slips and moved on … just like you.
Most importantly, I forgive myself. I then ask myself, “What can I learn from this episode?” I come out stronger and better for it.
Please forgive yourself and move on because You Are Worth It!
Thanks,
Dale
